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Your Splendid Poems

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Don't be shy. Share your stupid poems.

Click here to email your words.

Thanks to Jez Riley of Gt Yarmouth, England for the following untitled contribution...

A lady stood on a bridge one night,
her legs were all aquiver,
she suddenly coughed,
her head fell off
and floated down the river.


A thousand thanks and blessings to "The Cheezer" who has been kind enough to submit the following two verses for your amusement...


Tim

Tim, the insane inventor,
Created a woman, but bent her.
He stamped her nails
All ready to mail,
We don't know to this day where he sent her.

Copyright Stuart Brewster 2001


Turkey

This educated mind is falling,
My teachers were unstable.
My geography is quite appalling:-
I thought Turkey was a place on my table!

Copyright Stuart Brewster 2001


Here's another piece from The Cheezer. This strikes a chord...

An Uphill Downward Struggle

Must I make the first move, always?
Give me another sign.
I can't tell if you're just being sweet,
Where you've mentally drawn the line.

Are you interested, or simply being friendly?
What do your senses say when we meet?
If like mine, you'll start to tremble
And your heart, in your throat will leap.

Could someone not ask me out once?
I swear, that's all it would take,
'Cause I always look like a complete fool
When I am on the make.

Copyright Stuart Brewster 2001


Award winning poet, artist and environmentalist, Christine McGuigan has been generous enough to submit this wonderfully vivid piece. Hey, we're attracting real writers!

Silly Senryu #454

dinner guests aghast
at Father's smelly, piercing
fart-burp concerto

Copyright Christine McGuigan-Bruness 2001


Kelsey has been kind enough to send us this cracking piece of verse. Well done, Kelsey!

The Fight

I was sitting at home
All alone
On a Saturday night.
So i turned on the TV
And what did i see
But two men in a fight.
Then i said to myself
"He looks like an elf,
And the other's as tall as he is wide".
Then he picked up a hose
And hit him in the nose
And the poor man started to cry.
Then he fell on his rear
As a small tear
Dripped out of his eye.
Then the one that was short
Was an awfully good sport
And the angry crowd knew not why.
He looked at the man
And took his burly hand
And gave him a pat on his back
Then to the surprise
Of the tall man's eyes
The short man gave him a whack!
Then he fell down the stairs
To "Who knows where"
And the winner was the short.
Then i turned off the tv
Afraid of what i'd see
And said "He'll probably sue him in court!"

By Kelsey age 15